Top 5 EXCUSES for a midday Nut Buddy break!

Here are the 5 best excuses to sneak a nut break without getting caught. Goon smarter, pump harder.

You’re halfway through your shift and your cock’s got the attention span of a coked-up squirrel. You've been staring at your boss' perky tits and juicy ass wishing she was a free-use fucktoy! You NEED to nut. But you can’t just say, “Boss, I’m gonna go edge to some bimbo cumsluts real quick.” (Or can you? # Goals.)

Here are 5 rock-solid excuses to Goon Guilt-Free:

Excuse #1 - Blood Sugar Crash

Emergency nut to stabilize blood levels. Science, bro. Just let people know you're feeling light-headed because you're low on sugar then you've got a good 10-15min window to get a steady stroke session in.

🔥 Pro Tip: Bring an empty Gatorade bottle for "proof."

Excuse #2 - Client Call / Meeting

No one questions the sacred "client call" excuse. Better yet, make it a "potential new client meeting" that way no one can follow up, you just say it didn't work out. Park somewhere shady or head to a random restaurant's bathroom, bust your nut, and come back “re-energized.”

Excuse #3 - Tech Issues

"My laptop froze!" or "My laptop is doing a software update" It's the perfect excuse because no one really understands computers, even IT are guessing half the time. Meanwhile, you're blasting fake tanned tits on your phone.

Excuse #4 - Meditation Break

Mental health is important! In fact, HR are always talking about the benefits of self-care and workplace wellbeing... Well, there's no better meditation than pumping that throbbing cock over girl cock, tight free use stepsisters or big mommy milkers!!

(If Nut Buddy’s Streak Tracker says you haven’t nutted today, that’s self-care, king.)

Excuse #5 - Cramps

Although it's one for the Goonettes, it can be gender neutral if you blame an old sports injury. Time to "grab some water and walk it off." No one will ask for extra details. They'll leave you alone to edge your way to "recovery."

Use them wisely!

You need a steady bank of excuses to go running to the bathroom every hour so you can have a quick stroke or longer pump session. Try not to double up or overuse them. Reset them in a cycle every month and you'll be edging more and working less in no time.